The Meaning of Life (Maybe)

*** This post is actually from June that I never got around to posting

Never really thought I'd be thinking of this concept until I was "older". But I've been thinking about it lately, does that mean I'm "older" now?

Anyway, here's how the thought process has gone so far. At first I was thinking, what is it exactly I want to accomplish. It's a pretty broad question, there are so many areas in life, so the list could be fairly large. From there I guess I broke down life into blocks, very much in the "Up in the Air" manner. You have social (family/friends), pursuits (work/interests), material (stuff you want to obtain) and oneself (personal growth). I kinda of skimmed through this fairly casually, but I'm meaning to actually write a list down in more detail. Though another thought kind of stopped me from doing so earlier.

This thought was, what is it that makes me happy or will make me happy. Will accomplishing any of these things make me happy? Then I started thinking, are these things that I want, or goals or expectations that outside forces (other people, society as a whole, etc...) want for me? Perhaps I will feel a sense of accomplishment, but joy and accomplishment are two different things that don't always go hand in hand, and I guess can be easily confused.

Then from there it became about a definition of happiness. I guess there are many ways to happy, not just this bursting excitement. For example, I am happy that I have somewhere to live, but it's not something I celebrate. I suppose there's a happiness based on contentment, relaxation and security.

But maybe I'm over complicating things. Maybe it really all comes down to the present moment in time. Am I happy doing what I'm doing right now? I guess I figure a whole bunch of small happy moments together would culminate into general happiness over a long period of time.

My Type

Having an interesting discussion with my boss (who is female) today at the office. It's kind of a slow day, so we were talking about attraction. We were comparing photos of two girls, one who I find attractive, and one that I don't. To me, there's a huge difference. To my surprise, my boss actually found the other girl to be more attractive! Not only that, she found that there to be little difference between their levels of attractiveness. To put it mildly, I was shocked. There was a girl who use to work for our major client that I had a HUGE crush on. My boss knows about it, she told me that she never understood what I saw in her.

From here, we started to dissect people's features, common threads amongst people we found attractive. It was interesting, because we both looked for very different features. My boss was all about the bone structure and skin tone. Where I was more about the eyes and smile. Her argument was that you could always put make up on a girl, but you need a structure underneath, and that most girls wore make up anyway. I said that I want a girl that I find attractive without make up, because most of the time if you're at home, the girl isn't going to be wearing make up.

Whenever people ask me what my type is, I usually say the girl next door type. But after our conversation, I guess it got even narrower. This isn't to say I wouldn't stray from these features, but I guess they are what I find ideally attractive.

I guess our findings were that I like a girl that is more on the cute, fresh faced, girl next door type. :P My boss called it the youthful wholesome type. Larger eyes, full lips, rounder cheeks, pointy chin. I thought about it for awhile, then compared those features to people I found attractive, and it sounded about right. Reese Witherspoon, Keri Russell, Anne Hathaway, it kind of all came together! Weirdness.

Things You're Never Too Old For - Part 1

I always saw graduating university and having a "real" job as being benchmarks of adulthood. In hindsight, this couldn't be further from the truth. However since then, I found myself still enjoying things that I did in my youth. I remember once I asked a friend of mine who is four years older than myself, if it ever stops. He said no, at first you try to deny yourself, thinking that you've outgrown things or should be too mature to participate in such things, but eventually you will relent and succumb to the fact that it's just part of you.

1) Checking Out Girls

This particular thing is the example from the story above. While I am not as bad as I use to be when I was in my teens, it still happens. After polling different guys, it is an activity that was universal amongst all ages. My boss put it this way "The day I stop checking out women, is the day I die". Sounds about right.

2) Saturday Morning Cartoons

This one might be specific to me, but I'll still put the tv on teletoon on Saturday mornings if I'm home with a bowl of cereal and watch Teen Titans, Clone Wars or Amazing Spider Man. Sure the jokes can be cheese sometimes, but regardless the format, the stories are still the stories. And I would much rather be caught watching Dexter's Laboratory than something like Laguna Beach.

3) Celebrity Crushes

This was almost every guy's obsession when I was in high school. Who was the current hottest celebrity out there. At the time the majority chose Jennifer Aniston, though I was more of a Courtney Cox fan, I eventually switched over, the Rachel hairdo got me, her initial haircut on Friends was terrible (seriously, watch the first season, WTF was that). Over the years it's changed as celebrities' fame comes and goes. 

I think it's important to have these celebrity crushes. Now before you laugh at me, hear me out. Of course we have no idea what that person is actually like, but it doesn't really matter, it has nothing to do with reality. Having a celebrity crush is like having that impossible dream that one aspires to. If one does not aspire to hope and dream, then what does one have to look forward to?

BTW, My one of current is Zooey Deschanel. She can act, she can sing, her blog is funny, has an almost equally hot older sister and she speaks French. Damn you Ben Gibbard (of Death Cab for Cutie), you are one lucky ass dude.

4) Candy

I don't mean "desserts" or junk food, I mean candy. You know, the stuff you ate as a kid that you probably rarely eat now, that's probably nothing more than food colouring and sugar. A few years ago I had pop rocks after not having them for years. It was awesome! Some other favourites include Popeye sticks (admit it, you pretended to smoke too!), Nerds and Fuzzy Peaches/Swedish Berries. I haven't had any of these in a few years, but on the rare occasion that I do, it's good stuff.

5) Playing in the Sand

I was sitting on the beach the other day, waiting for a beach volleyball game to finish. Sub consciously I just started running my hands through the sand. Picking it up and piling it it's a little mound, then flattening it and starting over again. Sometimes I'll just start making random sketches in the sand. I saw some kids making sand castles, I didn't tell anybody, but I wanted to join them! It looked like so much fun!

6) Blasting Music Really Loud and Singing Along

Growing up, everybody in our house woke up and got ready for the day at the same time. My dad use to play his music so loud that it seemed the walls were shaking from the Calypso music of the Mighty Sparrow. Eventually my brother would blast whatever the Hip Hop choice of the day was. From my room would be some form of Alt Rock. Walking in the hallway upstairs, you would be bombarded with three sources of music.

Now that I live on my own, I still do that every morning. And if my dad could do it well into middle age, I don't see why I still can't either.