Tonight I met up with somebody whom I haven't seen for a long time. Over the past few years, I've seen him a few times, but never had a conversation over 15 minutes. This person was my best friend in high school. The last time we actually sat and talked, was probably around 12+ years ago.
Somewhat out of the blue, he sent me a message on Facebook, suggesting we meet and catch up. With some admitted hesitation, I decided it would be a good idea. The reason I approached this with hesitation was because I was probably the biggest reason we did not stay friends. My girlfriend at the time was overly possessive and did not want me to stay friends with my group of friends at the time. Being young, naive and wanting to please my girlfriend, I obliged unwillingly. The last time that I bumped into the guy over a year ago, lets just say he didn't exactly let me forget that.
Anyway, so we met up, exchanged the customary guy hug, sat and had a coffee and talked. Interestingly, it took only a very short period of time to catch somebody up on over 10 years of happenings. Basically went something like, went to university, got a job, stayed with the girlfriend, moved in with the girlfriend, broke up, moved out on my own, now I'm here. His story was relatively similar, went to university, got a job, married his girlfriend, got divorced, moved out on his own, found a new girlfriend. That conversation lasted not too long over 15 minutes.
It's surprising to me, how the past is quickly added up. My mind quickly thought, is this going to be the extent of the conversation? Was this a waste of time? The talk then shifted over quickly to what we were currently doing in our lives, mostly about work, hobbies, friends, family, etc... What I quickly found out was, that despite so much time passing by, we were both very different people than when we first became friends over 15 years ago, but at the same time we were still very much the same. I guess that over time, you grow and mature, but the core person who you really are stays the same.
This got me to thinking about shortly after Shelley (screw it, I'm using names) and I first broke up. I started to revisit my life before her. Started picking up the same hobbies and interests that I had given up on so many years ago. In a way I started becoming happier as I was rediscovering who I was as "Dave" rather than "Dave and Shelley". I had forgot how happy I was as just "Dave". Sure back then I wanted a girlfriend, and now it would be nice too, but looking back on it, I realize that I was happy back then, and I guess I'm trying to be just as happy now. I don't know if that's possible, after realizing what it's like to have a relationship of that magnitude, and the hole that it leaves.
It was interesting when I told him that I started to get back into things that I had brushed aside when Shelley and I started to date more seriously. This was my best friend at the time who I had brushed aside as well. While I highly doubt that we'll be hanging out all the time like we use to, maybe we'll start hanging out again occasionally.
It made me think, am I coming full circle?
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