I've always believed in the mentality that life is only a race against yourself. Comparing yourself to other people is a lost cause and that happiness can only truly be generated from within. Recently, I've been finding myself questioning this mentality.
In the social arena, it has become quite apparently to me that it's very "dog eat dog". There would be an attractive girl, and all the dudes would swarm this one girl. I would see this phenomenon, and admittedly sometimes part of it, and just think "wow, what a bunch of douchebags". The girl seems so helplessly bombarded by attention that she may not want, completely unsolicited. Most of the time, I try to just stay away from that situation, because frankly, it just reeks of pathetic-ness.
There's this girl that I kinda like, she's awesome and everything, but the situation is, so does every other guy. This "friend" of mine is currently pressing pretty hard of late. What pisses me off is that he claims that friends do not step on other guys territory, but he flirts with quite a number of girls. It's like he's fucking laying claim to any girl who's available. WTF is that!
Lately, this friend has been getting on my nerves, the pushiness and arrogance that other people see, I am only beginning to see. One of ,what use to be his close friends, I cannot stand. I would rarely say I hate somebody, but I literally hate the guy. So if the phrase "birds of the same feather, flock together" holds true, then I can't be completely surprised.
At first I was a bit conflicted, do I lose my "friend" by asking this girl out, or do I just let him do whatever it is he's going to do? I talked it over with my mom and her response is "what is this? high school?" finding the whole situation juvenile. I have to admit, once I thought about it, yet it is pretty juvenile, but it's the situation at hand. She followed it up with "a girl, if single, is nobody's territory, if you like her, ask her out, don't worry about what the other guys think". It's funny coming from my mom, considering she's usually all about the whole everybody should get along.
I suppose that's been a fault of mine over the years, is in opportune moments, not being selfish enough. She would say that I am too concerned if people will be upset with me. I've always felt things would work out as they should, just by being patient. But I guess what I'm realizing out of this situation is, that even socially, things do not come to you, you have to work for what you want. The right girl isn't just going to sit there and be there waiting. You have to go after what you want and forget rules of engagement or what other people think. Makes sense really, everything else in the world works that way, why wouldn't this? If you really want something, would you just let somebody take it away from you? Or would you fight for it?
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